We Don’t Struggle Alone

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Finding the Only One who truly wants to Help when we are Hopeless.

At my first defense, no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me. May it not be held against them.” ~ 2 Timothy 4:16

Have you ever found yourself alone with no one to support you? Even when you were among people who claimed to love you? Did you get mad at them for deserting you when you needed them the most? I have and let me tell you it is not a fun place to be.

Over the past few months I have faced several situations in my life that quite honestly caught me off guard. I was sailing through life, just doing my thing and BAM! out of nowhere here came a wave of epic proportions that knocked me off track. When I stopped spinning, I looked around and saw a scene that literally broke my heart.

Have you been there?

I realized after I dusted myself off and surveyed the damage that several things in my life were not what I thought they were. People I thought were my friends were anything but my friends. People I thought were not interested in being involved in my daily life truly were interested. The strength I thought I had was crumbled under the weight of the struggles I was carrying.

Have you been there?  

In today’s world people don’t want to talk about serious things like depression, anxiety, or panic attacks. It is perfectly fine to talk about any number of physical illnesses such as the flu, broken limbs, cancer, or heart disease, but don’t you dare talk about life altering illnesses such as clinical depression or anxiety. That’s where we draw the line. Many of us pack up our toys and go home when someone we know faces some kind of “mental illness”. We literally desert the people who need us the most because “we can’t handle them or their issues”.

Why?

Because we are so much better than them?

Because we don’t have those struggles and why would we? I mean, our life is practically perfect in every way. Come on man, don’t you read social media?

I have spent a good bit of time asking myself the question of why we leave those who need us most a lot lately. It doesn’t make sense why we leave people when they are at their lowest. Yet, we always do.

It really should come as no surprise that I spent a great deal of time wondering, questioning, and getting plain old mad about the fact that at my lowest I had very, very few people to turn to for help. When I realized this new territory, that I unwillingly found myself in was so very, very lonely I almost gave up.

Have you been there, too?

Today’s society only wants to see the happy, positive, good things in life. No one wants to open their eyes to the bad things. So, day in and day out we force ourselves to go to work, church, and the various other places life insists that we go even though we are silently dying inside. We put on our best clothes, fix up our highlighted hair, and paste on the biggest, fake-est smiles we can muster and do what we “have” to do.

I know you’ve been there.

In March, I decided that I was done with fake happiness. I was done with putting on a show. I was done with playing nice. I was tired and I was done with everything in my life. I didn’t want to end my life, but I sure did want to walk away from it.

So, I quit being nice. I stopped doing more for other people than I did for myself. I stopped playing the part that I assumed needed to be played. I receded into a shell and tried my hardest to push everyone else OUT.

Have you been there?

The Lord has used this dark valley to teach me more about Him. When I was at the bottom, I looked to the only thing that has been a constant in my life: My Bible. Inside those pages I struggled to find what God wanted me to know about this horrible place I found myself so desperately stuck in. Little did I know; He would use this time of pushing people out to open my heart to greater things about HIM.

I dug deep into His word and I studied what He wanted me to study ALONE. Just me and God. I couldn’t let myself get around people. Being around people, even the sincerest, truly Godliest people I know was just too much to handle. So, I retreated even further into my shell.

Have you been there?

This journey has been fascinating. I’ve been able to watch from the outside and fully process what I see and don’t see from people in general. What God has shown me is truly liberating! People, no matter how sincere or willing to help will always fail at the very moment you expect them to rise above the rest.

Always.

Even Christians.

Most importantly, Christians.

No one is perfect. No one has all the answers. No one is smarter, more capable, more important than YOU are to God. He loves us all the same.

Let that sink in for just one teeny tiny moment.

God.

Loves.

Us.

All.

The.

Same.

Can someone please say, “Hallelujah?!”

There are quite a few of us who honestly believe we are “better than, smarter than, more important than” other people. I hate to break it to ya, there friend. Yous been lied to!

See, the devil loves fooling us into thinking we are above one another or better than someone else because we “are in church every time the doors are open” or “we tithe over the required ten percent” or “we can answer more bible questions than anyone else in the room”. He uses things like jealousy and selfishness to make you feel like less of a person when your paycheck doesn’t equal one hour of someone else’s. He loves to create chaos and scenarios about how “so and so is doing this or that and you pitiful thing are not”. I bought into some of those lies.

Have you?

Today, I am seeing life a lot more clearly. I can recognize how far I have come in my walk with the Lord. I look back over my shoulder and see that He carried me through a lot of dark places, and I am forever grateful! The lies that I bought into had the potential to ruin my life, but God refused to let me go that far.

During my quiet time with the Lord this morning, He led me to this scripture in 2nd Timothy and I realized God had truly led me out of the darkness! He let the pain of the past few months teach me some lessons I would never have learned otherwise. I wouldn’t have learned any of this if I had stayed in that same rut and routine that I was in. It took drastic measures for drastic change to happen.  

I can’t hold a grudge against another person for being a sinner just like me. I can’t let my feelings of disappointment, fear, anger, or brokenness define who I was meant to be. I can’t blame someone else for the turmoil I created in my own life. I can’t wish I had something someone else has when I’ve been so blessed with more than I could ever deserve. I also can’t run away from people forever, but I can take a break from them when it becomes necessary for my survival.

You can too.

Today I can say “I’m free!” and 100% believe it. I can choose to live in that truth, and I can let the chains that have held me down drop right here in the dirt. I am a new creation who has been set free.

Being set free doesn’t mean that those demons I’ve been fighting won’t rear their ugly heads again though. Being set free means that I am not alone in my fight. God has my back. He’s my shield and fortress. When I am under attack I can fight courageously because I wear the full armor of God. He’s my portion and my guide. I don’t have to rely on myself. I have a helper that will never leave or forsake me.

Look what the very next verse in 2 Timothy chapter 4 says:

But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed, and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lion’s mouth.” 2 Timothy 4:17

 All this time that I thought I was alone in my fight, I wasn’t! The Lord stood at my side. He gave me strength. He was with me the whole time. Why?

So that you my dear friend might hear my story and see that God is good. He doesn’t just decide to help one person over another. He wants to help us all, but we have to ask for His help. Then, He can and will use all those things in life that try to kill us or defeat us for HIS good and the good of others. It’s not about you or me…its about HIM!!!

He doesn’t care what you’ve done or where you’ve been. He loves you just the same! He wants us to see that He is there and working for us no matter how bad the situation seems.

Today I learned that He doesn’t just want us to be thankful for what He has done. He wants us to tell others about the things HE has done so that they can find hope too!

Please don’t let people stop you from being the person God created you to be. He has a purpose for your life, and He wants you to complete the assignment the He has given you. The choice is yours though. Living life defeated is not fun. Living life scared, unsure, anxious, or doubtful is not really living. Stepping out of your comfort zone and making the choice to live a fun, happy, courageous life is easier than you may think right now.

Here’s the key to making it easy: realizing that you are never going to be strong enough to handle what life throws at you…but HE is!

Life is tough for all of us. At times it may seem like it’s easy for some people and excruciatingly hard for others when we are looking at their lives right now. We must all remind ourselves that seeing part of a person’s story is just that: part of the story. The only person who sees the whole story is the Lord.

So, keep pushing my friend. Don’t give up and don’t give in. Life may be hard right now. Some days it may even seem like you will never make it another minute and that’s OK. It is in those moments when you can hear that still, small voice inside your heart telling you to keep going, because God’s ways are not our ways. His mercies are new every morning!  

Choose happiness, love, and hope again today my friends. God is waiting to close that lion’s mouth just for you! None of us can do it alone, but we can do it with His help. If He will do it for me, I promise He will do it for you as well. We are all in this thing called life together.

If you see me out and about please say hello! I love hearing your stories too. He may not call you to write about your struggles, but He has called you to share them with others so that they can find hope in their struggles. God made that crystal clear in 2 Timothy 4:16-18 today. May He bless you as you set out to bless others along the way.

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